What Comes First? Calling or Gifting? 8 Questions To Ask Yourself

You are a busy mom and your days start early. In order for you to have any time to yourself,  you often stay up late. You feed your children, bathe your children, change your children’s diapers, and do your children’s laundry. When (if) they nap, you’re busy cleaning the house, making or planning a meal, and sometimes even grabbing a nap for yourself. You drive your children to play groups, the library, soccer games, and friend’s homes.

You are busy – but sometimes you feel frustrated because it can feel like you aren’t doing anything that important. As your life has slowly become immersed in mothering your children and keeping your home running, there can be a simmering desire to be involved in something bigger. To be out doing ministry, serving, and using your God given gifts and abilities.

Being a mom will look different from one person to the next. Some home school while others have children who attend public or private schools. Some husbands work from home while others leave for the day. Some have babies or toddlers, while some have older children.

I always thought I’d marry and live the kind of life my Mom did — going to Bible studies, out to lunch with friends while my kids were in school, and being there for them when they got home. But my life ended up being different than I imagined. It was different because God called us to homeschool our children. That meant that the bulk of my time was spent at home. My children were involved in co-ops, sports, and other activities as they got older, but much of our time was spent at home because the job of home schooling and doing it effectively was huge. On top of that, I had a home to keep in order and my husband and I were in full time ministry.

How does a mom decide what to be involved in apart from her home and family calling?

Here are some questions you can ask yourself that will help you to evaluate your season of life and help you to decide what might fit well into your schedule:
  1. Am I able to keep my home in order (not “perfect”, or “spotless”- but orderly)?
  2. Do I have the time to prepare meals for my family?
  3. When is my husband home? Do we have regular time together?
  4. Am I able to be consistent with disciplining and training my children?
  5. Do I spend time with other women that encourage me in my ministry at home?
  6. Am I finding my fulfillment and identity in ministry opportunities or my giftings? Do I have a hard time seeing the home and family as my most important ministry?
  7. How much time am I spending on the computer (blogging, facebook, etc.) and taking my attention away from those who are IN my home?
  8. If I  work outside the home, am I careful to be available at home when I am there?

I found that the “at home mothering” season of life for me meant that some of what I might have wanted to do had to be set aside for awhile – and most of the time I really didn’t mind that. It was for a season. It was not forever.

Being faithful to the calling of “at home mothering” was actually what God used to grow and prepare me for the ministry I have now that my children are grown.

Motherhood is a mission field. It is a “full time ministry”.  Yes! Every morning when your feet touch the floor you are on the mission field! You may have to sacrifice some of  your involvement in certain interests, or use of your giftings for a very short season, to embrace the high calling of the ministry of motherhood. But, be encouraged! It is all being used to conform us and our children to the image of Christ and will be used to point others to Him. It will prepare you to be most effective in the seasons ahead!